Presbyterian @ Wake Forest
Thursday, Aug 31, 6:30PM – BB&T Field
The remnants of Harvey will be making their way into the TN Valley when the tailgate period for this game starts ramping up. You’ll see cloudy skies and temperatures in the low to mid 70s through kickoff. There’s a better than decent shot of rain for this one, so you might want to keep your drinking to inside the stadium instead of huddled under the liftgate of your Audi Q7. You might not need to drink to watch this one, but it’s good to go ahead and start building a tolerance for when you need it during ACC play. There’s a 75% chance of angst towards triangle media outlets for ignoring this one.
Cal @ UNC
Saturday, Sep 2, 12:20PM – Kenan Stadium
Depending on when you trudge out to Chapel Hill for this one, and based on the shitty traffic around that area, I’d recommend going early. I’d also recommend grabbing a tray of cheese eggs from Nantucket Grill. Rain chances will be decreasing through the tailgate period, but expect mostly cloudy skies to persist through the end of the game with temperatures in the upper 60s around 8AM climbing to the upper 70s around kickoff. The good news is that UNC officials installed a ceiling that is a roof in Kenan this year, so any rain shouldn’t impact the game. Though my sources could be wrong here. 90% chance UNC handles this game better than Cal handles its finances.
NC State vs South Carolina
Saturday, Sep 2, 3:00PM – Bank of America Stadium
Scattered showers and thunderstorms along with breezy conditions can be expected in the Charlotte area for most of the day on Saturday into Saturday night. Mostly cloudy skies and temperatures in the upper 70s to lower 80s throughout the tailgate and game. We don’t expect much rain, but any rain that does happen has an 88% chance of ruining something for NC State. We don’t know what, how, or when, we just know it’s probably going to happen. There’s a 98% chance NC State is eliminated from the College Football Playoff conversation after this one. And a 100% chance of salt.
James Madison @ ECU
Saturday, Sep 2, 6:00PM – Dowdy-Ficklen Stadium
Depending on when you trudge out to Chapel Hill for this one, and based on the shitty traf—whoops, wrong one.
Cloudy skies with temperatures in the lower 80s falling into the upper 70s throughout the game. There’s a 50% chance of rain, though I’m going to go ahead and say it won’t rain. I’m also going to say that if it does rain, there’s a good chance Pirates fans won’t notice because there’s a 96.5% chance most of them will be hammered by kickoff.
NC Central @ Duke
Saturday, Sep 2, 6:00PM – Wallace Wade Stadium
Prime weather for tailgating if you don’t mind cloudy skies and temperatures in the mid to upper 70s. I’m not saying to ignore the other tailgates across the state, but if I had choice, I’d be in Durham for this one. A small chance of a stray shower, but I wouldn’t sweat it. Similarly, I’d imagine Duke isn’t sweating NCCU. 99.8643% chance that Duke beats NCCU 52-13. And there’s a 69% chance our Ben Swain has no pants by kickoff.